Reflections

After reading this book several times, I have finally decided to write my thoughts on it. It's not that I didn't want to write or was unwilling, but there was just so much I wanted to say about this book. I'll share my thoughts here, although they might lack some logical structure, for which I ask for forgiveness.

I believe the author must have experienced something similar in real life to write such a deeply touching story. After some research, I found that in 1913, Zweig came to Paris and met Marcel, who was suffering from abuse by her husband. They spent a brief but happy time together in Paris. A few months later, Zweig received a letter from Marcel just before her death, expressing her profound and passionate love for him, with no blame but rather filled with gratitude. Zweig commented on this, saying, 'A letter with no blame, thus seven times more moving. I waver between extreme shame and extreme shamelessness, leaning toward the latter.'

Additionally, let's talk about the background story of the author himself: Stefan Zweig formed a friendship with Freud in Berlin and Vienna when he was studying philosophy and literature. I believe this is one of the reasons why he could depict the human psyche with such subtlety and precision.

Now, let's start discussing the content of this book. The reason some people find this book moving while others remain indifferent after reading it, in my opinion, depends on whether one can personally relate to or understand the actions of the female protagonist. First, let's talk about 'understanding.'

The interpretation of the female protagonist can vary greatly. We can consider that her infatuation and love for Mr. R are, in fact, a complete loss of self, a kind of abnormal love. In her letters, we can see how a passionate woman loses herself step by step in the abyss of love. In fact, one point I want to make is that the female protagonist never achieved 'independence' in her mind or in love. Her soul always depended on Mr. R. She 'loved' her child, but it was mainly because the child was Mr. R's, and her 'love' for her child was just another manifestation of her infatuation with Mr. R. Therefore, many modern women may strongly condemn her for this, thinking that the female protagonist was completely consumed by love, sacrificing everything, and even her life, for love. Most people who hold an opposing view tend to share this perspective.

On the other hand, some may believe that the female protagonist's love for Mr. R was an unfair unrequited love that she imposed on him. In this perspective, Mr. R was treated unfairly.

From another perspective, the female protagonist had several opportunities in her life to directly reveal her identity and feelings to Mr. R, but she chose to wait for Mr. R to recognize her on his own. To some extent, this contributed to the tragedy. Her unspoken words and inaction were rooted in her deep-seated self-doubt. She elevated Mr. R to an extremely high level while diminishing her own worth. Her weakness prevented her from speaking up. She did not achieve real personal growth, both physically and psychologically. She clung to the feelings she had when she first met Mr. R at the age of thirteen, and this immature mindset defined her approach to love. This is indeed a sad state.

Speaking of her lack of physical and psychological growth, I want to mention the impact of family on children. The female protagonist was born into poverty, her father passed away early, and her mother led a secluded life. At the beginning, the neighborhood relationships were also very unfriendly. All these family factors prevented her from having a proper understanding of relationships between the sexes and love relationships, leading to her distorted understanding. This was a major factor contributing to the tragedy.

So, after all this, what do I want to express? I want to say that self-deprecating infatuation is painful and undesirable. Labeling oneself as inferior in an infatuation will eventually lead to an unfair love and relationship, unable to build a bridge connecting both sides. Pursue love for yourself; that's the way of love."

This text discusses the author's thoughts on a book, particularly focusing on the protagonist's infatuation and the various interpretations of her actions. It also touches on the importance of self-esteem in love and relationships.

2023-09-26

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