成长中可能没人告诉你的20件事（下）
成长中父母是不是告诉过你很多人生的经验，那些经验帮助你少走了很多弯路。但是大人的经验永远都是属于他们自己的人生的，所以还是会有一些缺陷一些不足。一起来看看那些成长中没人会告诉你的20件事。
11. How You Treat People Matters
待人接物很重要
Treating people with respect and decency can get you a long way in the world. Remember that “honey attracts more flies than vinegar.” Being nice to people really does actually matter to people. You won’t get anywhere tearing other people down or blaming others for anything. Take responsibility for yourself, your actions and your feelings.
礼貌得体待人可以使你走得更长远。请记住：“蜂蜜比酸醋招蜂多。”善待他人真的非常重要。不论在什么场合、为了什么事情，都不要挖苦责备他人。请为自己的言行情绪负责。
12. Relationships Don’t Come Easy
亲密关系不易形成
Choosing a life partner/spouse is hard. Relationships in general are hard, not just romantic ones but friendships and family relations as well. Stay in touch with people who you really care about and who really care about you. Make an effort to stay an active person in their life if you really care. You will not have as many close friends as you get older and you will probably lose some friends as well. Remember that it is okay, not everyone who comes into your life is meant to stay forever; let them go and cherish the people who are still in your life.
选择生活伴侣并不容易。亲密关系都不易形成：不仅是恋爱关系，朋友关系和亲人关系也是如此。选择真正在乎你而你又非常喜欢的人。如果你当真在乎，那请在他们的生活里保持积极乐观。亲密朋友不会随着年龄的增长而变得越来越多，相反，你甚至会失去一些朋友。但你也不必太介意，毕竟生活中不是所有人都能一直陪伴身边；离开的姑且离开，现有的更应珍惜。
13. Be Prepared To Deal With Changes in Relationships
关系有变时，要懂得处理
Look at your time with exes and be thankful; even though it didn’t work out, at least you got to experience it and learn from it. You rolled the dice and lost, but at least you took a chance! Don’t think that just because something wasn’t meant to be for your entire life doesn’t mean it didn’t add value and was right where you needed to be at the time.
回望与前任的时光，请心存感激；虽然你们有缘无分，但至少你拥有过、收获过。虽然赌输了，但你至少抓住了机会！不要因为事情未尽人意就片面否定当时的价值与意义。
In your 20s, especially if you have a family, it gets harder and harder to spend time with friends because of so many different time demands. You will be pulled in every direction and it’s up to you to decide what your priorities are. Having a couple of close friends you can rely on can make a difference in your life. As they say “shared joy is doubled, shared sorrow is halved.”
20几岁时，如果你还建立了家庭，那么跟朋友厮混的时间会越来越少，因为占时间的事情变多了。事情四面八方涌来，你必须决定优先次序。如果能有几个好友，那会大有不同：因为朋友“既可以使快乐翻倍，又能让悲伤减半”。
14. Take Every Chance You Get
把握每一次机会
Life is about taking chances, grabbing opportunities and taking risks. Don’t be afraid to try something new, move somewhere new, work somewhere new, meet new people and learn something new.
生活就是要把握机遇、勇于冒险。别害怕尝试新鲜事物、移居陌生地方、进入新工作环境、认识新朋友或学习新东西。
15. Let Go of Expectations
抛开期望
Expectations ruin everything and most of the time our expectations are too high for those around us and for ourselves. No one is perfect and nothing is ever going to be perfect. The faster you can learn this and let go of too high or false expectations, the easier life will come to you. Expectations bring heartache and only cause harm. Expect nothing and appreciate everything.
期望搞砸一切。我们对自己及周围人的期望往往偏高。人无完人、金无足赤。若你能及早明白这一道理，放弃过高或离谱的期望，生活会轻松很多。期望使人紧张受伤。停止期望、享受一切。
16. Life Is Complex. Try Not to Worry
生活复杂，请勿自扰
Don’t worry because everyone has ups and downs. It’s just how life is. Life is extremely messy and complicated, but don’t despair because things will work out in the end. Keep living and keep on doing what you enjoy. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
每个人都会经历起起落落，请不要纠结烦恼。生活原本如此——混乱而复杂。所以，请不要感到绝望，事情最后总归会柳暗花明。继续生活，继续做自己喜欢的事。何必把自己逼得太紧。
17. You Get What You Put In
种瓜得瓜，种豆得豆
Happiness, love and confidence come from within. Life is what you make of it and what you put into it. You can create whatever life you want, and if you create that life and it doesn’t work for you anymore, guess what? You can create a whole new life that does work. You may not have a choice in things that happen to you but you have a choice in how you react to them. Try to stay positive no matter what life throws at you and get through the tough times by talking to friends, family and a counselor if you need to.
快乐、爱与自信源于内心。你付出什么，生活就会反馈给你什么。你可以随心创造自己想要的生活，如果创造的生活不尽人意，那你完全可以从头再来！你或许奈何不了周围发生的事情，但你至少可以选择如何应对它们。不论生活发生什么，请保持积极乐观；遇到困难时，可以跟朋友、家人或者咨询人员倾诉。
18. You Will Face Rejection
你会遭遇拒绝
You will be rejected at some point in your life. Rejection hurts at the very core of your being, but try not to take it too personally. Oftentimes, when you’re rejected it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the person rejecting you. Take it in stride, let it slide off your back and move on. I know this is easier said than done, but it will go a long way in making you feel better and happier.
你会在生活的某个时刻遭遇拒绝。拒绝让你大受打击，但你不可太往心里去。有时候，被拒绝并不是你的问题，而是对方的责任。所以，请坦然面对、一笑而过，然后继续前行。我知道，说起来容易做起来难，但它能使你更舒心快乐。
19. You Will Not Have Everything Figured Out Anytime Soon
你不可能任何时候都能很快想通一切
If you don’t have everything figured out by the time you’re 30, you’re not alone. If you’re not where you want to be in your life or career, don’t sweat it, you still have time. Some people never figure out what they really want to do with their lives, but they get a lot of great experience, learn new things and can transfer their skills to many types of jobs. If you know what you want to do in life, start doing it immediately, practice it as much as possible and you will get better at it.
到了30岁还没弄明白一切？不止你一个人这样。如果还没得到渴望的生活或职业，也请不要焦躁，你还有时间。有些人从没想清楚自己真正想要什么，但他们却能不断尝试新鲜事物、积累丰富经验、学习各式岗位的技能。如果你清楚知道自己要的是什么，那就立刻去做，只要不断磨练，总能越做越好。
20. Love More and Keep Your Heart Open
敞开心怀，多付爱心
Love is all that really matters in the end.Give of yourself more than anything. Try to be patient, empathetic, understanding, caring and gentle with other people. Get to know people better by asking questions and listening attentively. People usually like to talk about themselves and questions are a great way to get conversations going. Love people for who they are, just as they are, and realize that everyone is a work in progress! Life is a continual work in progress. We’re all just trying to find our way, and we’re all confused and looking for contentment. Life is a journey, and happiness is not a destination to arrive at, but a way of living.
爱是最后的真谛，比任何东西都重要。请学会耐心、悲悯和理解，请关心并温柔对待他人。有疑而问、悉心倾听，以此更进一步了解他人。人们通常都喜欢谈论自己，提问是展开话题的好方法。热爱人们本真的模样，发掘每个人的进步！生活本身就在不断进步，我们都在努力追寻、都心存困惑、也都渴求慰藉。生活是场旅程，幸福并不是理应到达的目的地，而只是一种生活的状态。
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