莓子酱

给内向的人5个约会的小建议

莓子酱

Introverts often have a more difficult time with social interactions than others. This is especially true when it comes to dating. Just talking with other people can be a challenge for many introverts. It’s no surprise then that the thought of actually talking to someone who might be a future partner can send an introvert into a tailspin.

内向的人在与别人交往的时候总会遇到更多的困难。尤其在约会的时候更是如此。对于许多内向的人来说,仅仅与人交谈都会是一个挑战。所以与一个将来可能成为自己的另一半的人交谈的时候,内向的人通常会陷入慌乱,这一点都不奇怪。

Here are a few quick dating tips for the introvert that may help.

这里有几个快速约会的小建议或许能够有些帮助。

1. Fess up.

1.坦诚。

Don’t pretend to be a social butterfly. There is nothing wrong with being introverted. Tell your date if you are someone who seeks friendship first or needs time to fall in love. You may scare away a few flakes, and instead attract people who will really appreciate you.

不要假装自己是交际花。内向没有任何的不妥之处。如果你想要交个朋友或者是想谈恋爱,那么你要坦诚地告诉你的约会的对象。你的直率或许会吓跑一些人,但是那些真正欣赏你的人会被吸引过来的。

2. Meet at places where you feel comfortable.

2.约在你觉得舒服的地方见面。

If you don’t like loud bars, don’t go there. Often introverts are also people-pleasers, and they will do what they think is asked of them even if they suffer. Find a place that makes you feel comfortable: a laid back coffee shop perhaps, or a park.

如果你不喜欢吵闹的酒吧,那就不要约在那里。内向的人通常会迁就别人,他们会按照别人意愿去做,即便是这样让他们觉得很不舒服。找个你觉得舒服的地方约会:气氛慵懒的咖啡店或者是公园。

Also, consider taking your date out for a walk with your dog, or to meet with mutual friends. You’ll at least then have an ally who will be there for you whatever happens.

同时你可以考虑在约会的时候带上你的宠物狗或者是你的朋友。这样至少在需要的时候你会有个可以依赖的人。

3. Avoid smooth talkers.

3.避开那些能说会道的人。

In a relationship, you need to be heard. If your date won’t allow you to get a word in edgewise, it’s not the right person for you.

在恋爱中,你需要让另一半听到你的想法。如果你的约会对象从不给你插话的机会,那么他不是那个适合你的人。

4. Look for subtle connections.

4.寻找微妙的感觉。

Sometimes we get so flooded by first impressions and things to look out for, it’s difficult to just feel what it’s like to sit with this person. Do you like being there? Or does it feel crowded, overwhelming, or make you nervous? Make sure you actually enjoy hanging out with your date.

有的时候你忙于考虑第一印象和许多需要注意的事情而没有去感受一下只是与这个人坐在一起的感觉。你喜欢在那里么?或者你有没有拥挤、压抑和紧张的感觉?你要确保你的约会让你觉得舒服才好。

5. Beware of takers.

5.小心那些只想占你便宜的人。

Introverts are often givers. We listen, pay attention, and want to be there for the other. Make sure you get to be on the receiving end of the equation. If you have to ask repeatedly for romantic gestures or to be included, this is what you sign up for down the road.

内向的人通常愿意付出。我们倾听,我们关注,我们愿意为别人做些事情。但是你要保证你的付出会有所回报。如果一段时间之后浪漫的举动或者一起活动是你反复要求的结果,那你就要小心了。

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